The Swedes Are Coming,
The Swedes Are Coming!

Since I'm a quarter Swedish, I can start with the old saying, "One thousand Swedes crept through the weeds pursued by a lone Norwegian." Nothing like a little Nordic humor to get the ball rolling. The Norwegians can call the Swedes whatever they like, but they are most certainly not a stupid people -- not only have they managed to stay clear of major warfare (while less fortunate nations like Norway fell to the Nazis and Quislings) for nearly two centuries long after their bad ass Viking days, but they have given the world such treasures as diverse and wonderful as the Nobel Peace Prize, Ingmar Bergman, Abba, and the all-purpose interior design mega-store IKEA. And guess what? IKEA is coming to Metro Detroit, finally compensating for the area's lack of a decent light rail system to hold it together. We're becoming bi-coastal, and not just third coastal! Woo-hoo! Grand opening at IKEA Canton, Michigan is slated for June 7, 2006. The address is: 41640 Ford Road in Canton, ZIP code 48187. And the IKEA website: www.ikea.com

I'm not exactly planning to fill my 1928 apartment with stuff just for the sake of having a ton of it a la Jack the Narrator in Fight Club, but IKEA really is a groovy place to get relatively inexpensive Euro-style furnishings; plus you can get Swedish coffee, lingonberries, and Swedish meatballs worthy of my grandmother Alexandra Drougge. Am I kidding? Yes and no. If you need something quickly and on a budget, this is an excellent place to find it. I am always looking, for instance, for little circle rugs -- bright red or flat black, perhaps -- and have not been able to find such things, leaving me to spare wood floors. My place is not exactly Spartan or worthy of St. Francis of Assisi in its modesty, but neither would Tyler Durden be likely to mock me as an "IKEA boy." Still, who couldn't use a little extra pizzaz from time to time? IKEA saved my ass a few times when I lived in Philadelphia as a graduate student, and frankly, I miss the experience, which is quite un-American (in a good way, of course).

Until now, the nearest IKEA stores have been the ones located outside of Chicago, Pittsburgh, and Toronto, though my favorite will always be the one at Plymouth Meeting outside of Philly. IKEA items are fun to exchange when you move, too -- I had lots of fun with two female French graduate students who sold me some stuff for very cheap. What could be more internationally-tinged? C'est oh!

Some of the odd kinds of items IKEA specializes in are worthy of additional posts. But for the curious who wonder things like "what does TDK stand for?," IKEA in full derives from the first two letters of the Swedish founder's name (Ingvar Kamprad) plus the first letters of his his boyhood home (Elmtaryd Agunnaryd). Isn't that something? Better than NORAD and SAC, I suppose. So, let's pull out the Abba and zip on over come June, just in time for the new hurricane season.

IKEA, IKEA, IKEA!